


My Reflection

by Waifuwifi



Category: Stray Kids (Band)
Genre: Consensual, Drama, Dramatic Fennec Fox, First Kiss, Fluff, M/M, Romance
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-04-02
Updated: 2018-04-04
Packaged: 2019-04-17 12:33:21
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 3
Words: 2,781
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14189064
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Waifuwifi/pseuds/Waifuwifi
Summary: Jeongin doesn't understand his own feelings and he tries to find the reason for his rejection of physical contact with other people. He will need the help of his companions, especially Chan, to find the truth in his own reflection.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> It's the first time I write a fanfic, I hope the history makes sense! XD  
> First of all I want to make it clear that everything is FICTION. None of this is going to happen in reality, so you know what you can find with the tags, the warning is for something.  
> Sorry if some line or expression isn't understood too well, English is not my first language.  
> 

''Jeongin-aaah'' arms closed around Jeongin's neck and chest unexpectedly from the back ''cuuuuuteeeeee'' Jisung rubbed his cheeks making strange voices on Jeongin's back as Jeongin struggled to free himself.  
  
Jeongin considered himself a shy person, which, to be an idol, was somewhat contradictory.   
On stage and in front of the cameras he tried to keep his character as sweet and extroverted maknae, but all his teammates knew that it was not like that.   
Everyone treated him as the group's mascot. Every day and at any time he always had someone hugging him from behind at the least expected time.   
In the dorms. When they practiced dance. In the singing classes. In the recordings. Between cameras.   
Jeongin looked at the ceiling rolling his eyes, blushing while Jisung hugged and cuddled him.  _Help_.   
For him it was somewhat uncomfortable, not because he didn't appreciate his teammates, but because he never knew how to handle physical contact with other people.   
  
It's a normal thing to hug, do nosense cuddles, even sleep in the same bed of your companions when you live with them practically 24 hours a day and you shared housing and room with them every day, right? In the end he always ended up blushing, with an accelerated heart and trying to escape the attacker.   
Sometimes he felt bad for feeling this way. And the worst thing is that it seemed that his bandmates always enjoyed his reaction, which they found even more adorable,  _especially_  Chan.  
  
''Jisung, let go of our poor fennec fox and start stretching at once.'' Snap out Chan's voice from the other side of the practice room.   
Chan was always there to save the chestnuts (although, everything had to be said, Chan was the first to harass him with the game of hugs). He'd have to thank him for it later, anyway.  
  
Shaking off his wrinkled clothes once released from Jisung, who was reluctantly going to the center of the room to continue stretching before practice, Jeongin sat on the floor in a corner, trying to catch his breath. He began to stretch his arms as he watched what exercises his mates were doing, when his eyes stopped on Felix and Changbin.  
  
Felix was sitting on the back of Changbin, who was lying face down on the floor, trying to help him stretch his arms and legs, in his own bubble apart to the rest of the world, both laughing as if it were  _the most natural thing_  in the world. He was struck by the way Felix stretched Changbin's arms. Carefully but firmly, as if he had something precious in his hands.   
You could read in his face that he was treasuring that moment, almost, Jeongin would say, with affection. Changbin let himself be done, relaxed, as if trusting fully in Felix.  
  
The scene seemed so endearing to him that he could not look away, without realizing it, he had blushed, although there were other thoughts that he couldn't get out of his mind.   
  
_Why he couldn't have that attitude? Why he couldn't trust people like that? Why did he get so nervous and so upset at the contact with people close to him?_  
He suddenly felt a little envy.  
   
''These two are very adorable when they're together, aren't they?''   
Jeongin turned his head surprised when he heard Chan's voice practically on his left ear.   
  
''H... Hyung!''   
Chan was crouched down next to him, with half-closed eyes and a diabolical smile on his lips. He seemed to enjoy ( _a lot_ ) the expression on Jeongin's red face.   
He hurried to get up quickly when Chan grabbed his arm.   
  
''Come on, I'll help you stretch.''   
Instinctively Jeongin stretched out his own arm, perhaps too hard, freeing himself from Chan's clutches.   
  
''No, hummm... thanks. I'm almost done stretching.''  
At the moment, the expression on Chan's face changed completely. Jeongin couldn't tell if he was angry or disappointed, because at one point he stood at the other end of the room to continue stretching.   
  
At that time Hyunjin started the practice session by forcing each member to be in their respective formation, so Jeongin sighed in relief.


	2. Chapter 2

The rest of the practice session proceeded normally.  
At last they had debuted and needed to give their best in practice to succeed in the shows they had set in the calendar to promote their new song, so everyone's agenda was quite full. They were so exhausted from the effort that they returned in groups to the dorms practically in silence, and unlike other times where asking for a turn for the shower was a battle royale, this time they entered in turns without making much fuss.  
  
The first to enter was Chan, Jeongin waited his turn in his room with Changbin, who had finished and was distracted by watching something on his cell phone in silence, while others played videogames in the common room.  
  
He occupied the busiest room in the whole dorm, since he shared a room with three more people, which was chaotic for many days and ended with his patience. Changbin was a very calm person and it was easy to live with him, but then there was Hyunjin and Jisung. One spoke in dreams and the other was a hyperactive creature all day long (and when he got bored, his first victim was Jeongin). Jeongin was preparing the things for the shower when the door was opened a little after hearing some soft taps.  
  
''Hello.'' A head of wet blond hair with freckles peeked through the doorway.   
''The bathroom is already free, I think it's your turn, Jeongin-ah.'' Upon hearing the deep voice with a marked foreign accent, Changbin immediately raised the head of his cell phone.  
  
''Thanks, hyung.'' Jeongin finished collecting his belongings and left the room, on his way to the bathroom.  
  
Upon entering, enough steam covered the bathroom. He hoped there was still hot water. He closed the door, undressed and went into the shower. The hot water helped a little to relieve the tension in his muscles, but not in his mind. He was aware that his skills were still a little mediocre compared to his band mates, so he worked hard every day in practice so he can be less lacking the group. They were always helping him to improve, but he felt bad for always depending on them and for not knowing how to return the affection they always showed towards him.  
Suddenly he remembered Chan's face when he pulled his arm away that afternoon, and his stomach knotted. With his actions, would he be making his colleagues that always helped him so much feel bad? He came out of the shower faster than expected, feeling worse and worse, half-dried and dressed quickly. He left the bathroom, not too determined, with the intention of leaving his dirty clothes and towel back in his room and going to apologize to Chan.  
  
It seemed that everyone was in the common room, judging by the fact that the light in the corridor was off and by the noise that was heard from there. When he almost reached his room, he realized that the door was between open, and what he saw through the small hole before reaching the door left him in shock.  
  
Changbin and Felix were sitting together on the edge of the bottom of the bed of one of the bunk beds. Well, more than together, they were _stuck_ together. Stuck by their mouths. Jeongin was paralyzed in the hallway.  
  
Changbin raised his hand and placed it behind Felix's still wet head, pressing and kissing him even harder. Felix grabbed Changbin from his shirt and pulled him even closer to him, and Jeongin swore he heard a small wail in his deep voice.  
  
Blushing to his ears, he backed up and ran down the corridor with his heart beating a thousand times an hour. He opened the first door he found and ran inside, closing it behind him.  
  
''Huh?''  
  
Chan turned his head from the screen of his computer startled by the slam of the door. Jeongin, still with his heart fired, realized once that he had ended up entering Chan's room, that he was alone composing something, so, that night not everyone was in the common room.  
  
''Jeongin?'' Chan widened his eyes worried, still consternated by the sudden appearance of Jeongin. ''What happens? Has something happened?''  
  
''U-uhhh...'' Jeongin was still trying to catch his breath and calm down because he would swear he could almost hear his heart how fast it was going. _Shit_. Focus. _Quick_. An excuse, or something.  
  
At this point Chan had already risen from the chair and was approaching with worry drawn on his face.  
  
''Ah, uhmm ... I came because I wanted to apologize ... for this afternoon in practice.'' The words came out too hasty. He swallowed hard, squeezing tightly on the towel and clothes that were still in her arms. -I'm sorry for leaving you like that, I was not feeling very well, but I did not mean to react like that...  
  
Chan interrupted him by gently placing his hand on his forehead, which made Jeongin's heart quicken even more, if that was possible.  
  
''Are you okay? You are red and you are hot. You have a fever? You should not have put the shower water so hot.''  
Chan grabbed his arm firmly, opened the door of the room again and dragged him back down the corridor in the same direction he had come moments before looking at him with concern.  
  
''I'll take you to your room, you need to take your temperature and rest.''  
Jeongin opened his eyes wide and panicked. Tonight he was going to have a heart attack.  
  
  
'' _No! Hyung!_  '' He whispered in a low voice while trying to pull on the other direction, to which Chan gave a confused look.  
  
Halfway down the corridor, Chan stopped and covered Jeongin's mouth with one hand.  
The room's door opened and Felix and Changbin left. Each one was looking at a different point of the corridor, both with a red face, acting as if nothing had happened.  
Chan, with Jeongin caught motionless, saw them pass without saying a word with a frown. When they both entered the common room, he dragged Jeongin into the bedroom, closed the door behind them and looked at him with a face so serious it was scary.  
  
'' **What** in the hell just happened?''  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Jeongin is caught! D:  
> He's a Changlix shipper ♡


	3. Chapter 3

''What you have is not a _fever_ , isn't it?''  
Jeongin swallowed. An interrogation was coming from Chan.  
  
''What did they do in the room? What have you seen? You know you can tell me the truth. I'm not going to tell anyone, but I'm going to have a very serious conversation with those two.''  
  
He was surprised that he suspect what had happened just by looking at the face of Changbin and Felix, but the truth was that Chan's intuition rarely failed. That's why he admired him too much. He was the only person he could really open with, the only person who could trust to tell him anything that bothered him, Chan always showed understanding and gave good advice, and cared to help and make things easier for everyone. He always felt relieved after having conversations with him.  
  
''K... _Kiss._ '' He managed to say almost with a thin voice, looking at the floor.  
  
''What?'' Chan raised an eyebrow. He didn't seem to have understood it well.  
  
''That they were kissing, Chan, both of them. _In the mouth_.'' He said in a hurry. Chan kept his gaze fixed on her face. A few seconds passed before he opened his mouth again to speak.  
  
''It ... it was just that?''   
  
''Yes.''   
  
He deigned to look once and for all at Chan, who was still consternated. _Just that?!_ His thoughts must surely have been seen as written on his forehead, because Chan suddenly let out a laugh.  
  
''Jeongin.'' He managed to say while later, after stopping laughing, with an expression on his face as if he was having a great time.  
  
''What.''   
  
''You have never kissed anyone?''   
  
''No. What's that question now, Hyung? What does that have to do with all this?''   
  
''Your reaction is too exaggerated. A kiss is not a big deal, you'll realize.''  
For a few moments no other word was heard in the room. Jeongin leaned his back against the closed door behind him and meditated on that statement in silence, which seemed to calm him. Maybe he was being too over-dramatic. Maybe Chan was right. Well, Chan used to be right almost always.  
  
''Jeongin-ah.'' It was Chan who finally broke the silence.  
  
''Hum?''   
  
''You wanna?''  
  
''What?''  
  
''A _kiss_. Can I kiss you?''

  
  
Jeongin's soul fell to his feet, but he tried to control himself. A few moments ago he had come to the conclusion that a kiss _was not a big deal_. He looked at Chan, who was looking at him with like a totally neutral expression, as if he didn't care about the matter.  
He was surprised thinking that it didn't seem such a bad option either. That is to say. It was Chan. It's not a bad option for _your first kiss_ to be with Bang Chan. He was not going to judge him. And besides, it didn't seem like Chan cared too much. And he wasn't going to lie, he was curious. He surprised himself by nodding his head.  
  
Chan then crossed the distance between them with one step, put an arm in the door, without touching Jeongin, and without further delay he brought his mouth to the other's lips and kissed him. It was a simple kiss and lasted only one instant.  
  
''You see how it is not for so much deal?''  
Then he moved away, putting his hands in the pockets of the sweatshirt.  
Jeongin again was red to the ears, but soon he realized that something _was not right_.  
  
''Hyung.''  
  
''Hmm?''  
  
''This kiss doesn't look similar as Felix and Changbin-hyung's kiss. -Shooting.  
  
''Oh.''  
  
  
After a few seconds of silence the expression on Chan's face changed completely. Again the half-closed eyes and that diabolical smile, as if he were plotting something in his mind.  
  
''So they have that kind of relationship...'' He affirmed as if for himself.  
  
''What type of relationship? What do you mean?''  
  
Chan approached again, without answering, leaving Jeongin trapped between him and the door, and unlike before, where he didn't touch Jeongin, this time he grabbed his shoulder with one hand and with the other he grabbed the side of his face, throwing it back, with a strange mixture between firmness and something that Jeongin didn't know how to call, but he didn't put up any resistance, and he wasn't sure if it was because of the suddenness of Chan's attitude or because of his heart was going to come out of his mouth at any moment.  
  
''Was the _kiss_ more like _this_?''  Chan whispered in his ear and sent a shiver through his body, which Jeongin did not have the opportunity to answer, because when he opened his mouth to say something he found Chan's lips on his.  
  
This time Chan pressed his lips deeply against Jeongin's, and although he had no idea how to keep up, when he felt Chan's tongue trying to break through and looking for his own, he simply let himself go, defeated. The kiss was long. And wet.  
He could feel the heat emitting from Chan, who drew him closer and closer to him as they kissed. Jeongin did not even feel his feet against the ground anymore. He felt a hot sensation in his stomach and unconsciously grabbed Chan's sweatshirt by the sides.  
He was not sure if it was a _I'm going to faint_ or a _don't let me go._  
He swear that what was heard this time was not the accelerated heartbeat of his own heart, but Chan's.  
After a few moments Chan separated his mouth.

Jeongin felt like melted and mergedd against the door behind him and the arms of Chan, who still held him. Still confused, dizzy from how blushed he was, he realized that he hadn't yet released Chan's sweatshirt.  


 ''Cute.''

Again that grin. Suddenly Jeongin came to his senses and released him, and Chan moved away a little, examining the expression on his face with amusement. 

''Well, you should finish drying and go to sleep. If not, at this rate you're going to catch a cold, and tomorrow we need to be all ready for the practice session. Goodnight!''And without giving him the time to answer, Chan opened the door behind Jeongin's back, smiling and with a gesture of heart-shaped fingers disappeared behind the door, leaving him alone inside the room, still stunned.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Things start to get interesting, mwhahaha.


End file.
